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I’ve just been rejected. No-one loves me

If you think this is going to be a helpful article to help you get over the rejection from your actual/potential boyfriend, you’re reading the wrong blog. Sorry.
I made passing reference in a previous article about not getting the job. Let’s pick at the scab – I speak metaphorically. You have been rejected. “What does it all mean? What can I do about it?”
You’re allowed a moment – whole evening, in fact – of wallowing in self-pity. That’s it, though. Life is what happens while you’re waiting for life to happen, so you have to get over it and continue on your Road to Change Your Life. Changing your job may just be part of your striving for a bigger life change, in which case, everyone at Merit wishes you the very best for yourself, but I’m afraid I’m just here to write today about change in your employment situation.
There are many steps in the recruitment process. Rejection is thumbing its nose at you at every single one of them.
You are unrealistic about the sort of job, kind of salary of which you think you are worthy. It may take a loving friend/ family member/ trusted colleague/ AHA moment that you yourself have/ knowledgeable recruitment agency/ therapist to help you with this one. I sympathize; while I was waiting for Ryan Gosling to search me out, Eva Mendes got to him first, because no-one had the nerve to say to me, “You’re kidding, right?” Remember, even the Internet can help with info like market value salaries for some jobs. Try to be ambitious but realistic about your next position. You may not be Chief of Staff level yet, you may have to go through Senior Executive Assistant hoops first. Superman/woman? Not in dispute, but able to leap tall buildings in twobounces.  
Your resume may not be selling you as well as it could. Do your homework and spiff it up. You shouldn’t have to spend a fortune going to professional resume writers – there are so many other resources out there willing to help for free.
Your cover letter is ghastly and undoes all the good work of a fabby resume. Should I write a blog about writing good cover letter? S’ppose I should. The thing is, when you come to a staffing service, we’re your cover letter and know how to sell you to the potential employer, so I tend not to think about them as much as I do resumes. Maybe I should do my philanthropic bit and help those of you out there who are reading this blog but unlikely to come register with us – bit of a schlep from Minneapolis to Manhattan.
Yet another note to self: next blog topic.
Telephone interview. Remember the potential employer can’t see you and so, duh moment here, it’s different from in-person. You paused for a few seconds while you considered their difficult question, and then gave a reasoned answer but in the meantime, all the interviewer heard was – nothing. Sounding upbeat helps, the occasional, “hmm..” lets them know you’re having a wee think, and even, if it’s a real stinker of a question, “Ah, good question, thanks.” And then they know you’re thinking…
If you’re quite a quiet, low-key person, be true to yourself and not try to come across as Miss Effervescent 2015, but have a practice on some friends and ask if it sounds too monotone. At the other extreme, If you’re trying to get across how enthusiastic you are at the fact that there’s a perfect fit between you and the job, listen to the interviewer and answer what’s been asked, without gushingly interrupting (of course, the occasional interruption can’t be helped. “Ooops, sorry, I interrupted” will do the trick). Competent interviewers should give you the opportunity to tell them all the good stuff they want to know. “Can I tell you about a big project I managed?” Sigh. “Must you?” thinks the interviewer.
Face-to-face, in-person, they-can-see-you-perspire-with-nervousness interview. You can only do your best. You a) are an intrinsically awesome candidate and b) have studied all my previous blogs to help you maximize your job offer chances. So much can go right; you wowza-ed them with your experience, skills, education, personality. But an equal amount can go wrong. Some of it was out of your control – the owner’s brother-in-law got the job, the budget got slashed – don’t dwell on it, what’s the point. Just learn from what you think you did wrong, “Did I really f-bomb there?” “Was I too negative about my boss?” AND DON’T DO IT AGAIN.   
Follow-up was poor. You wrote a thank you email that read as though written by an alien from the Planet Zog. Get someone to read it through before you hit Send. You didn’t write a thank you email…YOU DIDN’T WRITE A THANK YOU EMAIL? ARE YOU INSANE?
You failed the background check… You smoked WHAT a few days ago? Sigh… You failed the credit check – oh well, wasn’t the job for you. Pick another future employer who doesn’t do credit checks.
And so on. And so on. Remember the crummy old line, which actually still makes me laugh, “You have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince”? Job searching can be a bit like that. Learn from your mistakes, become a better candidate and with luck, and a following wind, even in a yeugh economy, you’ll find a decent job.